Ask Oloris
As a first assignment I have received a series of questions which come off as the ramblings of a quite inebriated individual, and, although none of them are particularly geared towards advice, I will do my best to answer them. Please note, the replicated questions are spelled and worded as I received them.
1) How many chua can you fit into Grinoks mouth?
Zero. Chua are far too large to fit inside the mouth of any humanoid, assuming, of course, you meant Granok. Secondly, you should not attempt to force an ally into the mouth of a terrorist, doing so will be frowned upon by authorities.
2) Butt sex why?
Intercourse is a topic best left to be discussed with whichever partner you have a chance of experiencing it with. Data indicates that anal intercourse is a pleasurable experience to some, and in the case of many homosexual male relationships, the preferred method. With all that stated, given the immaturity of your question and its apparent attempts to fluster me, I would suggest working on your etiquette for now, as very few would want to experience it with you willingly.
3) where did the Eldan go?
An answer you should seek from the Vigilant church.
4) Why do you smell funny Oloris?
The natural odor of metal, oils, and ozone is not meant to replicate the scent of organic pheromones and sweat glands.
5) What does a Draken horn taste like?
A choking hazard. Additionally, for your safety, please refrain from attempting to sample any Draken as food, it is doubtful they will find it charming.
6) Why cant I have a pet Aurin?
Why would you even desire one? This question has many answers, the first and foremost being, considering your other colorful questions, you are not an individual I would trust with any pet.
That is all for this edition of this advice column. In the future I hope to prove perhaps more helpful advice to you loyal Dominion readers. Until then, Dominus watch over you.
Editors Note: If you have questions for Olorois, fondly called Ask Olo, please submit your questions to the editors.